RED HAT SOCIETY VOWS
I do solemnly swear on my hat
that I will do my best
to uphold the spirit of the Red Hat Society.
I greet middle age
with verve, humor and elan
I will take my silliness seriously
as it is the comic relief of life.
In the Spirit of Friendship and Sisterhood,
I join my Red Hat and Pink Hat Sisters
as we Go for the Gusto Together!
Beneath our frivolity
we share a bond
Common life experiences
and a genuine enthusiasm for life and living.
I promise to regularly practice having fun.
I promise to do those things
I have waited to do while I paid my dues.
I promise to learn to spit
and sit on the pavement.
I promise to NEVER wear nylons with open-toed shoes.
I promise to dispel the notion
that a Woman My Age is OLD.
This I pledge in the spirit of The Red Hat Society
as envisioned by the Exalted Queen Mother Sue Ellen Cooper
and with a Ruby Rascals Hattitude.
RED HAT VOWS
Read the solemn vows of the Red Hat Society, Chapter of the Ruby Rascals. After each question, answer with a robust “yes” ….or “no”.
Ladies, do you each wish to join in the fun of
The Red Hat Society, Chapter of the Ruby Rascals?
(Pause for each answer)
Do you agree to deal with growing more mature with humor,
and to take you silliness seriously?
(Pause for answer)
Do agree that you will join, in the spirit of friendship and sisterhood,
with your red and pink hatted sister as we boogie forth together,
bonded affectionately by a common “been there, done that”
and with real enthusiasm for whatever comes next?
Do you promise to regularly practice having fun now
so you know how to when you are old?
Will you learn to spit; will you sit on the sidewalk?
Do you promise to welcome with a "Red hattitude" our visitors and guests.
Do you promise to be a proper and fun guest when visiting
other Red Hat chapters?
Will you openly and knowingly fraternize with other Red Hatters?
Will you endeavor to learn to play a trumpet fanfare on a kazoo to help
welcome visiting Red Hat Queens in a proper manner, or at least learn
And the 3 bonus questions are:
Do you pledge to never, ever wear knee-high nylons
rolled down below your skirt?
Do you pledge to sew, never glue, the adornments on your hats?
Do you pledge to never talk about your grandchildren or pets at
(By pre-arrangement you should have someone yell out "NO". Turn to your
audience looking helpless or surprised, change to looking resigned or
amused, shrug your shoulders, turn back to the vow takers and continue.)
Oh well.......we'll continue anyway.
Ladies, once again, please place your right hand on your hat and repeat after me.
I do light-heartedly swear on my hat
that I will do my best
to uphold the spirit of The Red Hat Society.
This I pledge to honor the spirit of The Red Hat Society
and with a Ruby Rascal red hattitude.
Seal these vows with a zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzttttttttttt ON YOUR KAZOO